“There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship.” -Thomas Aquinas
The laughter, the good times, the support… Having a great group of friends is a beautiful thing to experience. When I first became pregnant, I noticed that there was a slight change in my friendships. We stopped hanging out as much and our conversations became further and further apart. Not intentionally, of course. It’s just that I was setting out on a different path in life than they were. Heading into uncharted territory, if you will.
It’s hard for your non-mom friends to relate to your day to day life as a mother. There is no reason you can’t still be friends but with this new change you are going to need to find some new friends.
Friends who won’t judge you when you have spit up on your T shirt and crumbs in your hair.
Friends who won’t question why you are still in your pajamas at 3 in the afternoon (and who will likely show up to your house in yoga pants with no intention of doing yoga).
Friends who can be your support when you feel like you’re failing at parenthood and assure you they’ve been in your position before.
Those friends are what you call a mom tribe; a group of mothers who just get it. A circle of friends who won’t judge your parenting struggles and will celebrate your joys. Read on to find out three ways you can start building your mom tribe.
| O N E | Head to the park or the library.
The park, the library or other places you bring your children to are the perfect places to meet other moms. Although for some of us, this can be extremely awkward and difficult. I mean, what do you say to a complete stranger?
-“Hey, I noticed you have a kid. I have a kid. Want to be friends?”
If only it were that easy.
But it doesn’t have to be that hard, either. Chances are they are also looking for a mom friend. Strike up a conversation by asking her about her child. It’s a bonus if they are around the same age because you can suggest you get together for play dates.
| T W O | Join a local moms Facebook group.
Interacting on social media can take a little pressure off meeting someone in person. If you are too shy or nervous to introduce yourself at the park, joining a Facebook group is your best option.
In the search bar, type in your city or neighborhood followed by “mom” and see what pops up. You should see things like Moms of Houston or San Jose Moms and Babies. These groups were created with the very intention of bringing moms together to form a tribe. Here you able to get and give advice, share stories and just talk to other moms. You can set up play dates or a mom’s night out, too. Oh, and sharing all the memes… who doesn’t love the memes?!
| T H R E E | Sign up for Hello Mamas.
Finding mom friends is a little bit like dating…Okay, it is exactly like dating. We’re looking for something serious and we are really afraid of messing it up. It’s awkward in the beginning and not everyone clicks but when you find the right person, you’ve gained a lifetime with each other.
And just like online dating sites, there’s an online mommy friend finder. Here is what Hello Mamas has to say about their site.
We help mamas at every stage of the motherhood journey meet local mothers for friendship and support, find playmates and playdates for kids, and get answers to the most common questions mothers have.
You start by filling out a questionnaire about your values, parenting style, how many kids you have, etc. Then you are matched up with other local moms who are similar. You can also use the MomFinder tool to look for other moms who live in your area.
No one can go through motherhood without a friend by her side. Build your tribe and cherish it… this mom gig is the toughest of them all.