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Things You Should Never Say To A Mom Who’s Been Around The Block

Things you should never say to a been there, done that mom who is announcing a pregnancy.

(Original image via Chrystal Cienfuegos Photography)

 

I’ve always loved taking trips down memory lane. Now that I’m a mom it’s become even more special. So when Facebook’s “On This Day” app notifies me of what I posted years before, I get ready to have all the feels.

Last week, the app took me back to the day I announced that we were pregnant with our second child.

Pregnancy announcement

With our oldest, we were so excited that we announced the day after we found out. The second time around, we kept it to ourselves until we were clear of the first trimester. We had 12 weeks of joy, 12 weeks of planning, 12 weeks of just obsessing over our new baby.

That is, we had that until we told people.

We received so many reactions, filled with support and love. On the other hand, we also received some that we could have done without. While we did a pretty good job of handling the negativity (in my case this meant not ripping off everyone’s head…pregnancy hormones are CRAY), our memory of sharing the great news is slightly tainted because of it.

Here is a list of things you should never say to a mom who’s been around the block:

 

1. Really? You’re having another baby?

No, I’m totally kidding! We just said it for the attention and laughs.

 

2. Keep this up and you’ll have yourself a basketball team!

 

3. Wow, another baby. How many more do you plan on having?

We’re actually aiming for a mini army.

 

4. You do know how that happens, right?

 

5. You need to learn how to say no.

Hmm. You know I could do that but….

 

6. I guess you guys don’t know what condoms are, huh?

 

7. Now you really won’t have a life!

Wait…you mean to tell me I can’t binge watch Netflix or eat ice cream in bed anymore?!

 

8. How are you going to handle another baby?

Been there, done that. We’ve got this.

 

The list could go on. Honestly, no matter what your opinion, the only thing that should be said after someone announces their 2nd, 3rd, 4th etc pregnancy is any variation of the following:

  • Congratulations to you/your family
  • How exciting
  • What a blessing
  • I’m so happy for you

And that’s it! It’s so simple. If you can’t bring yourself to leave it at congratulations, just don’t say anything at all. Welcoming a baby is a pretty big deal and trust me, the parents will remember when you tried to rain on their parade…even if you thought you were just being funny.

 

 

 

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  • mylittlerobins

    I love all the Gifs : ) These are so true! If only everyone would learn to say “congratulations, what a blessing!”

  • Karen Yannacio Morse

    So crazy that people offer comments with judgement in them when it’s much easier to say “Congrats!” Or “how great!” Either way- your post with the gifs is hilarious and a fab way to remind people what to say!

  • Janel Berchielli

    Having only two kids far in age due to infertility I’ve never had anyone make comments like this. I admit I have thought this for other friends but only because I see them struggling and always yelling at their kids. But I’m certainly never going to tell someone rude things about them growing their family.

  • It really is awful that people make judgements like that, as long as you love and care for your children who cares how many you have? Congratulations by the way and well done for sticking two fingers up to the haters xx

  • Lindsey Smith

    Aw, the fact that you announced your second child and had to hear negative comments, I’m so sorry. I think that so often people don’t think before they speak or like the comedian says, “here’s your sign”. Congratulations!!!

  • Theresa

    These are so funny, but I agree, people who hear the news should not make comments! It’s such an exciting time.

  • Amber Nelson

    Yeah those are some things you definitely do not want to say! Judgments are never good!

  • Whoa. Some of those border on plain rudeness. There’s another way to take care of that, but I can tell you are a girl with a little spunkiness, so I know you already know how to handle that bull****.

  • Krystel Seijo

    I can’t believe that people actually say things like that, I can’t imagine what causes them to do that. A baby is cause for celebration!

  • Lisa Collins

    LOL! I heard many of these when we found out we were expecting twins after our oldest two were 6 and 10. When we told my parents my dad said “you do know how this happens, right?” Yeah dad….we do! 😀

  • Hahahaha..Those are funny, and I love the comebacks! I have never said those things to someone, but I’ll be honest, i have thought of several a few times.

    • We all have our opinions, that’s natural. But voicing hurtful ones to a happy person/family does no good.

  • Katriza Luna

    LOL, these are so funny! I can totally see myself coming up with some really witty comments on a few of these! haha

  • Oh my! I can’t even imagine what I would say to someone if they made one of these comments to me with my 2nd or 3rd! Great list of things you should say in response to a pregnancy announcement.

  • You need to learn to say no?! Do people actually say that? Bloody hell, that’s ridiculous! I always say if you haven’t got anything nice to say don’t say anything at all! x

    • Oh, believe me they do haha. I wish everyone had that mindset!

  • Oh my goodness this is so funny! I remember when my mom got pregnant for the fourth time some of the things people would say to her. She also gave them majority of the faces in these GIFs.

  • For just your second little one?! I am flabbergasted about that! 2 seems like such a normal amount to me…of course I have three…and I think after 3 it might start to go downhill 🙂

    • You don’t want to know about our first pregnancy announcement 😉 We are pretty young to most, I suppose.

  • I never understood why people say things like this. If someone wants a large family just be happy for them and let them be!

  • Mamabops

    Thankfully, I’ve never experienced any comments like these. I can’t believe people say things like this! It’s not anyone else’s business.

    • I’m so glad you never have! You have no idea how happy I am to hear that. It’s tough. I can laugh at it now, but at the time it hurt. Here we were, very excited to share, and some people treated the news as if the baby was a burden. That’s not how we will ever look at our babies!

  • Queen City Mama

    I love this. Just as it is important to not question why a couple doesn’t have children, I think it is important to not be negative about multiple children as well. There are people that are happy with one child and there are people that are happy with seven. Opinions about how someone’s family should look are unnecessary and rude.

    • Right! When people are ready, they will make changes to their family.

  • Becca Wilson

    People that have more than one child don’t need to be asked the questions that a new mother does. They also don’t need unsolicited advice really.

  • Hahahaha #7 makes me laugh so much! netflix bingewatching… I don’t have any kids and already don’t have time to binge watch netflix! People need to mind their own biz!
    How about a “cool, congrats”. Though I told someone that once and they burst into tears because they weren’t sure they wanted to be pregnant again, so even that can be loaded! lol!

    • Aw, I’m sure they appreciated your support after they weren’t so emotional, though!

  • Your list made me laugh! I could think of a few peeps I know that definitely put the foot in their mouth! LOL!

  • TheMummyToolbox

    wow I can’t believe you got this kind of negativity! although these GIF’s are on point, some people just need to learn to tone it down and mind their own business

  • happy organized home

    I love the GIFs those are great. Whenever I hear someone is pregnant either with their first or more my response is usually ” is it a good thing?” not because i’m judging but because some people aren’t necessarily trying and I sort of feel bad congratulating right away just incase they’re not happy about it. If it’s someone I know was trying my go to is a congrats, no matter how many they have it’s their choice I don’t have an opinion on how many children they have one way or the other.

  • Reesa Lewandowski

    These are hysterical, thank you for sharing this good laugh to me! It’s amazing how awful people are over a special time!

  • ALL of these things. People say the darnedest things to pregnant women and it never occurs to them that those things might be really, really, RUDE! haha!

  • Rachel Catherine

    People often don’t say the best things when they find out others are pregnant. I don’t know what it is but something about pregnancy makes people beleive it’s ok to be rude.

  • Inez Bayardo

    I only have one but my pregnancy was a shock to the whole world and I got some really crazy comments, too. The condom one I can totally relate to. I can’t tell you how many people asked if we used one or why we didn’t use one. It’s very bizarre how pregnancy makes people think there are zero boundaries.

    • I always wondered that, too! Obviously, we all know how a baby is made…do we really need to ask? Haha.

  • It’s unbelievable how rude people can be. All it takes a simple congratulations without being snarky! These are good comebacks, though. – HilLesha

  • Paige Rodriguez

    Oh gosh, I can only imagine! I only have one so far but remember the witty comments that came with that so can only imagine what will be said for #2! These gifs nailed it